This place can't be remotely serious.

[Except it seems that it totally is, and Envy doesn't like it one bit. She'd been busy at home, dammit.]

Okay look, this whole setup is cute and everything- but honestly? I'm a little insulted. You'd think if the universe was going to kidnap me, it'd be to someplace a little more high-budget than this.

[Or something cool and indie, at the very least.]

So I guess my first question is- does anyone know the fastest route back to Canada? Because I've got this ten city tour that kind of needs its headlining act, and I would so hate to disappoint the people who paid for those shows. After that, I guess my second question is- does anyone know where I can get some decent clothes? The stuff in this bag is... cute, but it's not exactly my style, you know, and frankly-

[She leans down, handing her Pokégear to someone who backs up with the wave of her hand, showing off her outfit.]

These boots? Seriously not made for walking. So if you can help out, I'd appreciate it.

[And with a slight flip of her hair, she bends again to turn the Pokégear off.]